Abolition of the seasons
That politicians do nothing is simply not true. They influence our daily lives more than we assume, more than we would want if we knew they were doing it. Of course they do nothing for climate protection, for example; that is just a word written on paper as a heading for agreements and declarations of intent, for which hundreds of hectares of rainforest are cut down every day. The Romans and Carthaginians already knew why they razed the North African jungle called the Sahara to the ground; it all grows back and regenerates, just like the Aral Sea, the Chinese marshlands and the Great Barrier Reef. But they are doing something for our beliefs. Especially for suggesting to us that we are doing everything right if we nod like a wobbler on the hat rack at every brake.
So the planned abolition of seasons is not an arbitrary decision like the number of proven new infections to justify levels of restrictions, but follows a plan forged in long negotiations with representatives of business and independent interest groups.
Spring, summer, autumn and winter
Even the names are misleading and meaningless. The fact that we understand winter as a cold season is only due to outdated farming rules and similarly unreliable sources of information. But global warming is not to blame for this either, and fortunately this is now being set straight by wise politics.
Carnival has long been considered the fifth season, which, in calendar terms, begins before the fourth and lasts just under four months, depending on the course of the moon, which is to blame for the division of the months, which makes just as little sense if you look at it closely (for more on this, see the article April, April).
But that is not all. In September, in fact, another overlap in the retail definition of seasons has begun: the pre-Christmas season. Everywhere you can buy Christmas biscuits with the onset of late summer. Meteorological niceties like temperatures around 30°C are - as we already know - not a benchmark for considerations that apply in air-conditioned or at least ventilated above-ground dens like shopping centres.
Who doesn't think of the extension of the opening hours of outdoor swimming pools when they hear the words Spekulatius, Zimtsterne, Printen, Makronen, Stollen, Lebkuchen, Apfel, Nuss and Mandelkern?
So, in order to remedy this grievance and inconsistent dilemma, as well as to avoid further overlap possibly with another season, people are being inoculated to stop using politically incorrect terms such as Christmas, which might suggest the discriminatory implication of a Christian ethos.
In North America, where Islam is not part of the country as it is here, another end-of-year festival is considered more significant anyway. Thanksgiving coupled with the idea that the natives threw ugly, large, flightless birds into the campfire as an offering to the settlers to reaffirm their intentions of peace with the people who had instigated their genocide.
The timing is well chosen, because at the moment the population as a whole wants nothing more than to be taught something that has nothing to do with breathing difficulties or contact restrictions. Carnival and Wies'n are cancelled nationwide anyway, which admittedly least itches the Prussians, but only Bavarians, Hessians, Rhinelanders and perhaps Württembergers, who do nothing but celebrate all day anyway and ignore well thought-out protection recommendations out of pure conviction and paradoxically self-responsible self-thinking.
After gypsy sauce (see article Balkan sauce), negro kiss and Danube wave have undergone a social change in the food and luxury food sector, it is now the turn of the inaccurately overlapping and potentially racist designations of the quarters of the year, and rightly so. Suggestions as to whether and which designations may be used as substitutes are ignored by the EU Commission, as are the survey results on the abolition of summer time. After all, the term already names a season that is already two months past before the clocks are set back and the spice biscuits, formerly Christmas or winter biscuits, are then already in the starting blocks for the sell-out.